Hello! I am excited to be here! Recently, I have been reading a lot of posts by women about how they worry that they do not feel “fulfilled” in their roles as mothers, and wondering about or attempting to find that fulfillment elsewhere. I vehemently feel that we have lost sight of what “fulfillment” is all about. In a nutshell, I feel most “fulfilled” when I am purposefully creating happy, mentally healthy children.

Let me start at the beginning by introducing myself and why I’m at this point, developing this blog, now.

My earliest memory of “career choices” was in the third grade when my teacher assigned us a project to draw a picture of what we wanted to be when we grew up. I had two limitations with this assigment.

First, I had already learned that in the early 70s, my career choice was unacceptable to socially-conscious women. After all, it was the era of debating the Equal Rights Amendment.

Second, somewhere between Kindergarten and third grade, I had learned I was not a good artist, a belief that persisted up until college when I took a required art course. Besides, how do you draw a mom?

Because that was my choice in careers.

So I cheated. I looked around, saw my neighbor’s paper with a simple nurse’s hat, said “I can do that,” and copied it. My teacher loved it. Goal accomplished: I got an A. For years after that, I dodged the question of “What do you want to do when you grow up?”

It was a mark of extreme trust to confide in a boyfriend that I wanted to be a mom. After all, I attended college, graduated, had a good, well-paying job in a worthy “career”, and totally did not want to do that for the rest of my life. And did not wish to marry a young man who expected me to do that.

My “career path” was that of a technical writer. I wrote policies and procedures for a major aerospace company and then moved into technical software documentation. None of which would endure for longer than 5 years at the most. I hurt for something where my efforts would actually make a long-term difference in the world—or at least in my corner of the world.

So at age 29, I met my Mr. Right. Other than the very important fact that we were mutually attracted to each other and had similar goals and beliefs, the fact that his mother had worked for a short stretch in his life but was otherwise a SAHM was reassuring to me. That and the fact that I had figured out through the course of getting acquainted and dating, that he was totally committed to the idea of his wife staying home. I was to learn that he was not well-positioned to provide for our family, but commitment from both of us took us the rest of the way.

Was it easy? Are you nuts?! It took an incredible amount of faith to quit working when I had my twin boys. I was the main breadwinner at the time while my husband had just received a raise to $9 an hour.  We believed it was right for us to take that step so we did. With a lot of parental help (and several credit cards), we made it. Because of those early lessons we had to learn, today my husband provides very well for our family. He became the man I saw in him from day one.

Do I believe that all women should stay at home? Whether I do or not, often that is not possible and the list of reasons are endless. Do I believe that women want to have happy, healthy, well-balanced kids? How does “Duh” sound for an answer? Is it easier for a SAHM to focus on that? It certainly can be. Could I be supermom? Don’t know, and don’t want to try!

This blog, though, is going to be my attempt to be at least mostly transparent and let you see my attempts at helping my children develop and maintain healthy personas. Mental health at its best. I have studied writings from Carol Tuttle, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), and tapping from various individuals. I am not an expert. I am a mom, a parent, just like you, with a deep love for my children. Feel free to comment, to share things that work for you because I am a student.

Most of all, I hope you enjoy the ride!